14 ways I've intentionally designed my life (and what that actually looks like in practice)

Because life design isn't about blowing everything up — it's about the small, intentional choices that make your life actually feel like yours

I share so much about life design because not only am I deeply passionate about the topic, but because it’s been a real, ongoing journey that I’ve been on for the last seven years.

And I think when people hear “life design” they picture something extravagant — quitting your job, moving to another country, blowing everything up and starting over. But that’s not really what it is.

Life design is the small, everyday stuff. It’s the moments where you feel most like yourself. Where you’re doing things that actually energize you. Where you’re prioritizing what feels good instead of just what’s expected.

So I wanted to share the ways I’ve been intentionally designing mine — the practical, real, sometimes unglamorous ways that have actually changed how my life feels from the inside.

I stopped choosing work based solely on what I was good at.

For a long time, I stuck to work that was aligned with my skillset. What I went to school for, what I had experience in, where I excelled. And yes, I was good at it. But I didn’t really love it. And I think that’s one of the most confusing places to be. When you’re good at something and people recognize you for it, your identity starts to wrap around it. So when it doesn’t bring you joy, it’s hard to even give yourself permission to want something different.

Once I started exploring work that actually filled my cup, that I was genuinely excited to do, I really couldn’t go back. That saying “choose a job you love and you’ll never work a day in your life” starts to feel very real when you’re finally pouring your energy into something you’re actually passionate about.

I stopped waiting until (insert excuse) to enjoy my life.

“When things slow down at work, then I’ll take the vacation.” “When I save up more money, then I’ll be happy.” “When the kids are older, we’ll finally take the time off.”

Whatever the excuse is, I’m sure you’ve said a version of it. There is always a “better time” to do something. But the reality is, time is the one thing you’re never getting back.

I spent so much of my life operating from a “more first, enjoy later” mindset. Do more, achieve more, output more, then I’ll relax. Then I’ll live. The moment I decided to stop waiting for permission to actually enjoy my life, everything changed. I started experiencing what it felt like to just be in my life instead of constantly running toward the next thing.

I created a career that lets me be present for my daughters.

When I had my twin girls, something in me shifted overnight. I had always been career driven — ambitious, always doing, always achieving. And then Quinn and Piper arrived and none of it felt as important anymore.

I didn’t want to be the mom who was always working, always on her phone, always somewhere else mentally even when she was physically in the room. I wanted to be present. Actually, genuinely present. And that required me to build my work around my life — not my life around my work. So that’s exactly what I did. Everything I’ve built since then has been designed around being home, being available, being the mom I actually want to be. That’s not a sacrifice. That’s a choice I’m really proud of.

I stopped treating rest like something I had to earn.

For most of my adult life, rest was a reward. Something that came after I had done enough, achieved enough, proved enough. Which meant I almost never actually rested because there was always more to do.

What I’ve learned is that rest isn’t the opposite of productivity. It’s part of the design. When I stopped treating it like laziness and started treating it like a non-negotiable, everything in my life started to feel more sustainable. I have more energy, more creativity, more capacity because I’m finally giving myself permission to stop.

I stopped saying yes to opportunities that look good on paper but don’t feel aligned.

This one is ongoing work for me, honestly. I’m someone who is good at a lot of things, and I’m resilient enough that if I put my mind to something I will figure it out. Which means I have a long history of saying yes to things because I could do them not because I actually wanted to.

Now, every time an opportunity comes up, I ask myself how it feels, not just how it looks. Does it align with where I’m going? Does it fit the version of my life I’m building? Or is it just a shiny distraction that will pull me off course? Saying no to things that don’t fit has been one of the most powerful life design moves I’ve made.

I became intentional about who gets access to my energy.

Energy is everything. And for a long time, I gave mine away pretty freely. To people who drained me, to relationships that were surface level, to situations that left me feeling worse than before.

I’ve really curated my inner circle over the last few years. I don’t do relationships where I can’t be fully myself anymore. If I’m giving you my time and my energy, it’s because I genuinely feel safe, seen and energized by you. That’s not about being selective in an unkind way, it’s about being honest that how I spend my time and who I spend it with directly shapes how my life feels.

I stopped trying to fit into versions of success that weren’t mine.

The corporate ladder. The hustle. The constant output. The metrics and milestones that were supposed to mean I was doing well. I chased all of it for a really long time. And I got a lot of it. And it never felt like enough because I was always chasing someone else’s definition.

The moment I stopped trying to fit into a version of success that was never actually mine and started defining it for myself (on my own terms, aligned with my actual values) everything started to feel different. Success now looks like presence. Like freedom. Like a life that feels good to live in. And that version fits a whole lot better.

I chose a partner who accepts me exactly as I am.

This one deserves its own essay honestly (and maybe it will get one). But I spent years in a relationship where I constantly shapeshifted — becoming whoever I needed to be to keep the peace, earn approval, feel safe. It completely dimmed my light.

Daniel has never once tried to change me. He has always just let me be exactly who I am — fully, without judgment, without conditions. And I think having that kind of safety in your most intimate relationship changes everything. It gives you a foundation to actually grow from instead of constantly performing.

I started listening to my intuition more than other people’s opinions.

I used to make every decision based on what made sense to other people. What was logical. What was explainable. What wouldn’t raise eyebrows or require me to justify myself.

Now I check in with myself first. How does this feel? Does it feel expansive or draining? Does it feel like a yes in my body or am I just convincing myself? My intuition has never once steered me wrong when I’ve actually listened to it. The mistakes have almost always come from ignoring it.

I built white space into my schedule on purpose.

I used to fill every gap. If there was a free hour, I found something to put in it. It felt productive. It felt responsible. What it actually was, was an inability to be still.

Now I protect white space like it’s a meeting I can’t cancel. Unscheduled time. Space to think, create, rest, be spontaneous with my girls. Nothing fills a schedule faster than busyness and nothing makes life feel more like yours than having room to just breathe in it.

I created morning rituals that let me pour into myself first.

I wake up an hour before my girls every morning. Warm lemon water, a cozy blanket on the couch, reading, my Activation, future self journaling and then I’m ready for the day. It sounds small but it has genuinely changed how I show up for everything else.

When you pour into yourself first, before the demands, before the needs, before the noise starts, you move through your day from a completely different place. You’re not already depleted by 8am. You’re not giving from empty. You actually have something to give.

I spend more time outside and closer to nature.

This one feels almost too simple to include but the impact it’s had on my nervous system is real. Sunshine breaks, walks with nothing in my ears, sitting on the deck while the girls play. Being outside, actually in my body, in the environment, not on my phone, is one of the most regulating things I do.

We are overstimulated almost every minute of the day. Going outside with no agenda is one of the quickest ways to come back to yourself.

I let myself outgrow versions of my life without guilt.

This might be the most important one on the list.

I have outgrown schools, relationships, careers, businesses, friendships, identities. And for a long time, every time I outgrew something I felt guilty about it. Like I was unsettled, or ungrateful, or like something was wrong with me for never being satisfied.

Now I understand that outgrowing things is not a flaw. It’s evidence that you’re evolving. And the guilt of leaving something behind is almost always smaller than the cost of staying somewhere you’ve already outgrown.

I spend more time creating than consuming.

Writing. Coaching. Journaling. Cooking. Being outside. Making things with my hands.

There is something deeply regulating about creating. About making something, expressing something, putting something into the world. Consuming (scrolling, watching, absorbing) has its place, but it will never fill you up the way creating does. The more I’ve shifted my ratio toward making things rather than just absorbing them, the more like myself I feel.

None of these things happened overnight. And I’m still working on all of them (some days better than others).

But that’s what life design actually is. Not a perfect, finished product. Just a series of small, intentional choices that slowly move your life closer to feeling like yours.

You don’t have to redesign everything at once. You just have to start somewhere.

Sending you so much love,

Meg xo

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A little note 🤍

This is actually the kind of work I do with women 1:1 as a Life Design Coach.

We take what feels overwhelming or “off” in your life and break it down into simple, doable shifts — so you can create more space, clarity and ease in your day-to-day and design a life you actually love. If you’re curious, I offer free clarity calls.

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About the Author:

I’m Megan — a writer, twin mom and Life Design Coach, documenting what it looks like to design a life that feels calm, intentional and fulfilling in a very full season. I write about identity shifts, giving yourself permission to want something different and designing a life you actually want.

Let’s Connect:

✨ If you’re feeling stuck, unclear, or like you’ve outgrown your current life, this is for you. Book a clarity call and we’ll map out what you actually want and the next steps to start building it a life you actually love.

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